Chapter twelve

Forgotten

I have to stop.

I’m sitting on the sand, the wind is blowing all around me, making my skirt flow through the air. The sun is high in the sky, and the horizon across the ocean is beautiful. Kathy is next to me, a look of peace and happiness setting in her eyes. We decided to stop by Bowers Beach on our way to the FBI headquarters. I was hesitant at first, but it’s only an hour taken away from the day,  and we still have time. I breathe in the salty and cool air around me. I need this. Kathy was right. I’ve been worrying about Mae for 3 weeks, getting barely any sleep at all. Last night at the hotel, I got the best sleep I’ve gotten in a long time. My body feels relaxed, I feel at peace. Everything is perfe-

Mom, stop.

No, no, this isn’t right. I’m not supposed to be feeling relaxed. I came here to find Mae. Nothing else. I jerk up from the sand.

” We should go Kathy. Its almost 12,  and we need to get to the headquarters soon.”

I can Kathy’s eyes change, almost as if they cloud over. she sighs, pulling herself up.

“I know, It’s just so beautiful Martha, why don’t we walk to the pier, its just a few feet awa-”

” Kathy, no,” I bark. she flinches, her eyes flickering, and her neck reddening. I recoil, putting my face into my hands.

” Oh Kathy, I- I’m sorry, I just, we need to do what’s needed right now, and its making it to the FBI.”

She looks down at the sand, ” No Kathy, I understand. I’m sorry, I just get so carried away sometimes and this beautiful beach, its just hard. But can we at least get lunch before we go? I’m starving.”

I fight the urge to bark at her again. Instead my fists ball up at my sides, my fingernails digging into my palms.

” I- yeah, I guess that’s fine. But we need to go to the FBI right after okay? Please, no other stops.”

Kathy’s face gleams, joy creeping back into her eyes. She wraps her arms around me, causing my entire body to tense up. Again.

” Thank you, Martha. Just lunch, I promise.”

As we walk back to the the car, the familiar feeling of worry and nerves, start to flow through my stomach. We need to get to the FBI soon, I need to find Mae.

I need her back.

 

It takes us over an hour to get to lunch, and two hours to eat. It almost seems like Kathy wanted to find the busiest restaurant to eat at in D.C, because the line was almost going out the door. I look at my watch. 3:30. We need to go right now. We should have been there by 2:00.

” Okay Kathy, we really need to go now, its 3:30, the headquarters have to be closing soon, and if we don’t go today, it’s closed for the entire weekend.”

She swipes me away, and starts walking down the sidewalk.

” Martha, you need to stop being so adamant about this, we have so much time still. The place doesn’t close until seven. When I researched it, it said that they were busiest during the afternoon. Now let go see the Monument! I need to get a picture of us in front of it for my daughter.”

No, this isn’t what’s supposed to happen. We can’t keep holding this off. The quicker we go to the FBI the quicker we’ll be to finding Mae.

” Kathy, wait!”

She keeps walking, waving her hand for me to follow. It closes at seven, we do still have about four hours. Just an hour at the monument won’t hurt. I trust Kathy that she knows what she’s talking about. Besides, she did all of the research for me, before we left. She insisted that I rest, and let her handle everything. I sigh, craning my head up at the sky above.

Mae, I’m coming. Soon.

” I’m coming,” I shout, as I jog up ahead to her.

We have all the time in the world.

---

We reach the monument by 4:30. Everything is beautiful. I should have taken Mae and Mark here. They would have loved it.

Mark. 

My mind drifts to him, and my chest aches. I wish I didn’t leave the house the way I did. He hasn’t called me at all, and only one text asking where his suits were. Classic Mark. He’s completely forgotten about Mae it seems.

I will never forget Mae.

Kathy snaps me out of my trance.

” Martha, hey! There’s wine tasting over there, we have to go! It’s been ages since I’ve been out to a wine tasting event.”

I look at my watch; 5:30. 30 more minutes won’t hurt.

I sigh, ” Okay, let’s go, but we have to make it quick.”

We make our way over to the tent, setting up at a table facing towards the Lincoln memorial. The waiter brings the first bottle to us that’s made here in D.C. He fills up my first glass. Five minutes later he brings a second, different bottle. And then a third. Bottle after bottle he brings us, Kathy cheering each time. By the 5th glass of wine, My head is spinning, and everything is fading in and out. I can’t make out Kathy’s face. She’s laughing at something, but everything is echoing. I suddenly remember. I glance down at my watch, barely making out the fuzzy numbers.

6:00.

I stand up wobbly from my chair. My hand grabbing onto the table, keeping my balance. The world feels like its spinning,  and my head is clouding up.

” We havt’a go now.” I feel the words come out of my mouth, like sticky syrup. My mouth feels weird, and I can’t feel my tongue. It starts getting more blurry and I feel myself starting to wobble again. I feel Kathy catch me, and stand me up again. She’s still smiling, but shes’s saying something. I can’t hear her.  I feel someone else take my other arm, and they guide me out of the tent.

Then black.

---

I startle awake. I’m drenched in sweat, and immediately my head is filled with jolts of pain. I groan, and put my hands up to it. I’m in the hotel room in the bed. Wait. Why aren’t we at the headquarters? My eyes search for the clock next to my bed.  It’s 8:30.

This cannot be happening.

I frantically pull the covers off my body and stumble onto the floor. Dizziness overtakes me again, and I steady myself against a chair. Where is Kathy? I search the room, but she’s not here. Suddenly the door to the room unlocks, and she comes in with a fast food bag.

” Oh you’re awake! How are you feeling? I thought you’d be hungry when you woke up, so I got us some food.” She steps toward me to feel my head, but I step back.

” Wh-why aren’t we at the headquarters?”

Kathy frowns. ” Well for one, You were extremely drunk, and we both know that it’d be a bad idea to walk into the headquarters like that.”

My head starts to spin again. Was I that drunk? Why didn’t she stop me at the wine tasting? Why didn’t we leave? This isn’t adding up. I watch Kathy as she un-packs the food from the bag, humming to herself.

” Wha- I- I don’t understand Kathy. Why didn’t you stop me? Or at least warn me about the time. You don’t understand that this was our one and only chance for contacting the FBI.”

She scoffs.” Oh please Martha, you know that wasn’t going to work. I mean I assumed we were on the same page here. Did you really think that they would let us in to talk about a kidnapping? There are hundreds of the same cases here. Every single day.”

I can’t process this. I don’t understand. I sputter my words out.

” No, Kathy, y- you looked up this, you researched everything, what are you talking about? the whole reason we came out here was to find Mae!”

I feel my voice on the urge of raising but I try staying calm. There must be a mix up, Kathy’s probably still a little drunk. She sighs, and walks over to me, now a few feet away from my body.

” Martha. This trip wasn’t for Mae. It was for you. We both know she’s gone. I wanted to give you a trip to help you get over this, and overcome it.”

There it was. That word.

Overcome.

The same word that therapist used. I suck in my breath.  How could I be so naive? so clueless? I step away from her quickly, my heart starting to beat faster and faster.

” But see Martha, it’s okay! She may be gone, but she’ll always be in your heart. Let’s just enjoy the rest of the trip,” she steps forward to hug me.

” No!” I scream. ” Don’t touch me! H- how could you do this? I trusted you Kathy! You were the only person that has been on my side. I- I can’t believe this, why, woul-” I couldn’t finish my sentence, My eyes are filling with tears, and darting all over the place. My breath becoming quicker, and my head throbbing again.

” Martha, please you have to accept thi-”

I step back again, now up against the wall. I can’t breathe, I need to get out of here. I rush past her, and grab my purse on the table. I stop at the door, now with tears streaming down my face. What have I done? I almost forgot about her. I almost forgot about my Mae. My breath is shaky and just above a whisper when I speak next.

“I will never, forget my Mae.”

My eyes meet hers for a split second.

Blank, and numb.

I sprint down the hall, and slam open the door to the stairs. I need to get out of this hotel, I need to get home. I need to find Mae. I run down the stairs, tears are sliding down my cheeks, one after another. I reach the ground floor and burst out into the lobby. People look over concerned and the receptionist asks If I’m okay. Everything is foggy again, but in a different way. I push past the lobby doors and tear out into the sidewalk, sobbing, and trying to catch my breath. I sprint across the sidewalk, My breath ragged, my legs burning.

I’m running away. Running from Kathy, Running from the darkness that was trying to make me forget Mae. My worst fears are starting to become  my reality.

I’m losing her.